Full of hot air

The Ragister reports Cedar Rapids police arrested a man in a government building restroom lying beside an inflatable doll.

The Hellary doll was most upset with authorities and hissed...

“I believe in a zone of privacy.”

She continued...

“Research shows the presence of women raises the standards of ethical behavior and lowers corruption.”

Professing her love to her new beau, Hellary said...

“The American people are tired of liars and people who pretend to be something they're not.”

Hellary was asked what first drew them together...

"...when you get to be my age, having so many men paying attention to you is kind of flattering."

He appears to have inflated her ego, one can only hope he takes her breath away.

Asked about the differences between her and her guy, Hellary spewed...

"What we have to do... is to find a way to celebrate our diversity and debate our differences without fracturing our communities."

Hellary then popped off with...

"There is a great deal of political pressure to only talk about abstinence, and to deny support for condoms and education on using them. This policy will lead to the unnecessary deaths of many people."

When asked how her supporters would judge her, Hellary responded...

"In the Bible it says they asked Jesus how many times you should forgive, and he said 70 times 7. Well, I want you all to know that I'm keeping a chart."

Reporters wanted to know how this would hurt her Presidential campaign, Hellary nonchalantly stated...

"If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle."

I guess this story may have been overblown and the scientific community is united in that fact.

I'm off to take a leak.