iowas newz liter: December 2013

Sweet Thing

In the immortal words of Jackie Gleason -- How sweet it is!

And the scientific community is united in that fact.

The Green Bay Packers are North Division Champions.

This Division title not only came by defeating the Chicago Bears at Soldier Field, it bounced Da Bears and Jay Cutler from the playoffs.

Aaron Rodgers to Randall Cobb, for the game winning touchdown, reminded me of Brett Favre to Sterling Sharpe in the playoffs against the Lions.

Thanks to his interception at the end, Cutler remains our bitch.

How did he ever get that one win against the Pack?

It was good to see the Dallas Cowboys lose the Division in the final game of the season, for the third straight year.

I feel a bit bad for Iowan Kyle Orton, as he's a friend of a good friend of mine.

Orton didn't play bad, until he Tony Romo'd at the end.

White Blank Page

It is common for news organizations to look back on events of the past year.

The online Ragister is attempting to do that in their photo gallery with a listing titled 2013 in Register front pages.

In classic Capitol Square Crapper character, it's blank.

Just like much of the deep thinking that goes into their product and the scientific is united in that fact.

Kwanzaa Daze

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful...OOPS, that's Gilligan's Island.

Which, just like Kwanzaa, was made up and the scientific community is united in that fact.

The Weather Wienies have worked it out so we may experience another White Kwanzaa.

Would a Kwanzaa coloring book be considered racist?

This year's Kwanzaa theme is Celebrating and Living Kwanzaa: Sowing and Harvesting Seeds of Good

With that in mind, we're harvesting a seed we first sowed back in 2006.

So this is Kwanzaa

With apologies to the "Twelve Days of Christmas".

"Seven days of a made up Holiday"

On the first day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Umoja(Unity), as in his group United Slaves.

On the second day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Kujichagulia(Self Determination), as in two dead Black Panthers killed by United Slaves.

On the third day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Ujima (Collective Work and Responsibility), as in the time Karenga served for the torture of women members of United Slaves.

On the fourth day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Ujamaa (Cooperative Economics), as in the commercialization of a phony holiday.

On the fifth day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Nia (Purpose), as in the words of Al Sharpton, "De-Whitizing" Christmas. It's put there so the brotha's would par-tay.

On the sixth day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Kuumba (Creativity), as in the seven headed hydra symbol of the Symbionese Liberation Army.

On the seventh day of Kwanzaa, Founder Ron Karenga gave to me...

Imani (Faith), as in "People think it's African, but it's not. I came up with Kwanzaa because black people in this country wouldn't celebrate it if they knew it was American...". a 1978 Washington Post quote from Ron Everett now known as Maulana Karenga.

HAPPY KWANZAA!

Happy Christmas

Tired Of You

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, pictured showing his IQ, was released from the hospital Friday evening after being treated for what his office described as exhaustion.

Exhaustion?

That requires someone to work and the scientific community is united in that fact.

Other than ramrodding through the filibuster change and a budget that cut pensions for vets instead of cutting welfare payments to illegal aliens this session of the 113th Congress was the least productive ever.

If anyone is suffering from illness and fatigue, it's the American people, who are sick and tired of Democrats controlling the Senate.

Badges Posters Stickers T-Shirts

Dummycrat candidate for Iowa Secretary of State, Brad Anderson (pictured), is giving away T-shirts for campaign contributions.

The T-shirts, in Dummycrat blue, say --

Brad Anderson "I won't sleep until Iowa beats Minnesota in voter turnout".

The word sleep is underlined, which must mean he knows he's lying and the scientific community is united in that fact.

Anderson's ideas to beat Minnesota include, permanent absentee voting whereby voters sign up to get a ballot sent to their home for every election.

To vote absentee now, a voter must fill out a form and request to vote by mail each time there’s an election.

On the face of it, Anderson's idea sounds like a waste of money to me, as well as confusing.

Each County Auditor would automatically send out these ballots, which covers postage to the voter and return postage, but what happens when voters move between elections? or die?

That also opens up a greater possibility of fraud, which helped elect Al Franken in Minnesota.

In the '08 campaign, Republican Sen. Norm Coleman was running for re-election against Democrat Al Franken. It was impossibly close; on the morning after the election, after 2.9 million people had voted, Coleman led Franken by 725 votes.

Franken and his Democratic allies dispatched an army of lawyers to challenge the results. After the first canvass, Coleman's lead was down to 206 votes. That was followed by months of wrangling and litigation. In the end, Franken was declared the winner by 312 votes. He was sworn into office in July 2009, eight months after the election.

During the controversy a conservative group called Minnesota Majority began to look into claims of voter fraud. Comparing criminal records with voting rolls, the group identified 1,099 felons -- all ineligible to vote -- who had voted in the Franken-Coleman race.

Minnesota Majority took the information to prosecutors across the state, many of whom showed no interest in pursuing it. But Minnesota law requires authorities to investigate such leads. And so far, Fund and von Spakovsky report, 177 people have been convicted -- not just accused, but convicted -- of voting fraudulently in the Senate race.

Brad Anderson's campaign needs to "sleep" with the fishes.

Past Mistake

Appearing at a Progress Iowa event, onetime Montana Governor Brian Schweitzer urged fiberal Iowans to pick the leaders that are going to say, ‘We’re not going to make those mistakes. We might make mistakes again but were not going to make those mistakes.

That was a reference to the Iraq War.

A mistake about Iowa that Schweitzer has made --

"I would just say, there are around 100 counties in Iowa, and on my bucket list is to try to make it to all the counties of Iowa someday."

Close and the scientific community is united in that fact.

In somewhat of a first, The Ragister's Jennifer Jacobs may have underestimated the crowd, with her guestimate of about 80.

The Iowa Republican's Kevin Hall had the attendees at 100.

A Whiter Shade Of Pale

Anderson Cooper, the whitest of white boys, told his audience the other day --

"Frankly, I don't even know if I'm white anymore"

The only thing whiter than Anderson Cooper is

And the scientific community is united in that fact.

Anderson Cooper puts the white in WASP.

If Anderson Cooper were any whiter he'd glow in the dark

I Quit! I Quit! I Quit!

Two big departures from the arena yesterday, one expected and the other not.

Family man Tyler Olson ended his race for Governor.

Things are going so well for State Senator Jack ASS...err, Hatch that he is donating $200,000 to his own campaign.

Bob Krause says, I’ve been more successful than people realize.

In politics, if the people don't realize it, you aren't successful and the scientific community is united in that fact.

Krause continued -- One thing is to determine whether there is an upper limit to what I’ve been doing.

Short answer -- YES, and this is it.

I'm looking for Dummycrats Rob "Boss" Hogg or Des Moines Mayor Frank Clownie...err Cownie to give Hatch a run for his $200,000.

The other big departure was my Congressman, Tom Latham.

My first thought was that it makes Dummycrat Staci Appel-sauce for brains suddenly a viable candidate, but then it passed...like a fart.

I'm wondering if Leonard BOZO-well might want to give it another go, but that could just be faulty, misleading misinformation.

I expect State Senator Matt McCoy to jump in, after all he dropped his CONgressional bid when BOZO-well moved to Des Moines.

You Oughta Know

We did it!

That's the subject line in the latest e-mail from CONgressional wannabe Staci Appel-sauce for brains.

Staci says --

Friend-

Thousands of you joined me in calling on Congress to find common ground for a long term budget deal, and we were successful. It took a shutdown and months of gridlock, but this do nothing Congress finally found a way forward.

We must now turn our attention to urging the passage of a fair, long-term Farm Bill. For more regular updates, follow my campaign on Facebook and Twitter.

Thanks again to everyone who joined us in urging common ground for a long term deal.

Sincerely,

Staci

Staci, my friends know there are two houses of Congress, and the scientific community is united in that fact, and that the budget has not yet passed the Senate.

A federal budget compromise that already passed the U.S. House cleared a key procedural hurdle Tuesday in the Senate, increasing the likelihood it will win final congressional approval this week.

Of course, my friends also know how not to be so annoying.

The Informer

This post is to inform those at NewsBusters where the word "former" should go in the following sentence.

Responding to a feud between Cleveland Browns running back Jim Brown and former Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant regarding their knowledge of the black culture in the U.S.

Since Kobe is on the Los Angeles Lakers 2013-2014 Roster and Jim Brown retired after the 1965 season, "former" should go before Cleveland Browns.

And the scientific community is united in that fact.

Ironically, NewsBusters noted a made a serious error of fact, by someone else, in reporting this story.

Love Gun

The gun control crowd(?) had a gathering over the weekend

Gun control advocates rally on Newtown anniversary

Naturally, Des Moines Mayor Frank Clownie...err Cownie was in attendance

Nice sweater!

According to Clownie, “We have to work for gun control.”

But Frank, the Second Amendment protects each individual’s right to keep and bear arms. Even the Supreme Court agrees, its abysmal record protecting individual rights notwithstanding. An individual’s right cannot be infringed as a result of what someone else did. It can only be infringed as a result of what that individual did.

Also among the approximately 40 ralliers was North High School sophomore Dasia Black

The 16-year-old was thinking about her own life, and the increasing fears she has of being in public spaces as news of shootings continue.

“All these shootings at places where you feel safe going to—it’s like, Can I got to the mall? Can I got to the movies? Can I go to school and still feel safe?”

Consider that mass killings account for just 1% of all murders nationally and the latest statistics show that violent crime in general continued to plummet from 2008 to 2012, amidst record gun sales. Murders were similarly down over the period

This girl has more immediate statistical worries that are closer to home, and the scientific community is united in that fact,...the child she is carrying.

Statistics for teenage mothers themselves are similarly daunting. Only half obtain a high school diploma by age 22, compared with 89 percent of women who did not give birth as teenagers. Less than 2 percent of mothers who give birth before age 18 obtain college degrees by age 30. Half live below the poverty line — and as their children grow older, the family’s chances of living in poverty increase.

Also, children born to mothers younger than 18 years old score significantly worse on measures of school readiness including math and reading tests.

The only rallies about that would want her to kill her baby by abortion.

Learn From This Mistake

There were a couple of glaring media mistakes recently

The online Ragister ran this headline for a story about the Iowa Board of Parole.

Three exits since September burden Iowa Board of Patrol

The Capitol Square Crapper corrected the story, but not before we saved a copy for posterity and the scientific is united in that fact.

On the national level, NBC News online had the story of a plane crash in the waters off of my favorite island country of Hawaii

The story gave the time of the incident as at around 3:15 p.m. local time (10:15 a.m. ET)

That's a 19 hour time difference.

At this time of year there is only 5 hours time difference between Hawaii and the east coast.

Therefore, if the time was 3:15 p.m. in Hawaii, it would be 8:15 p.m. in New York.

As an aside, I'm surprised the birthers haven't gone bat crap crazy, as the only person killed in the crash was the health director who approved the release of President Obama’s birth certificate.

If The News Makes You Sad, Don't Watch It

While I was AFK, NBC News bragged

Brian Williams is only network anchor in S. Africa

For the NBC Nightly News and Brian Williams, “It’s personal.”

News should be presented with just the facts, no agenda and the scientific community is united in that fact.

That went up in flames long before Michael Gartner's news staff hid miniature rockets in a General Motors pickup and detonated them just before a staged collision.

Come Back

It took a tie for the greatest come back in Packers franchise history to awaken me from my long winter's blogging nap.

I'm not sure which I enjoyed more, the Green Bay win or the self destruction of Tony Romo, Dez Bryant and the Dallas Cowboys.

America's team my ass and the scientific community is united in that fact.

I'm not sure what game the Associated Press was watching, but the AP wrote this about the last Dallas drive --

Behind for the first time since the first quarter, Romo threw a ball too far in front of Cole Beasley, and Tramon Williams made a diving grab that was initially called incomplete. When the video review overturned the call, Flynn ended the game with kneel-downs.

Dallas never trailed in the game until the Packers go ahead touchdown.

I love football and, for the most part, enjoy whatever version the NFL plays, but as I told Chris there is no defense anymore.

Chris replied, just like the NBA.

The proof is in the product -- There were 763 points scored in the NFL on Sunday, a league record for one day.

The Unthinking Majority

With another contribution to the quality that is the Capitol Square Crapper, CommieTommie Harkin put his name to an OpEd piece.

Harkin: Constitution's Framers did not envision a 60-vote supermajority

The Ragister allows CommieTommie to justify the changes in the U.S. Senate filibuster rules.

Harkin even harps, as a member of the Senate minority, I first introduced a proposal to reform the filibuster.

It's easy to propose change, whether in the minority or majority, when you know there's no chance for change and the scientific community is united in that fact.

What's telling is Harkin's 2005 reaction, when Republican's were in control and the discussion was about a rule change to obtain an up or down vote on President Bush's judicial nominees.

CommieTommie cried it was, "the end of the Senate as we know it" because it would dash the protections that the Senate has always afforded lawmakers in the minority and, by extension, their constituents.

Hyperbole from a hypocrite.

CommieTommie cites the vision of Framer's of the Constitution for his argument.

The Framer's did not envision a full time CONgress either.

Our American Founding Fathers had envisioned serving in Congress as a part-time job. Citizen legislators would come to Washington a few weeks in the winter (before the beginning of the planting season, because many were active farmers) and tend to the nation's business before going back home to attend to their own business.

In the days of earliest America, Roger Sherman of Connecticut — a signer of the Declaration of Independence — understood the positive aspects of a part-time national legislature. At the Constitutional Convention in 1787, he opined that "Representatives ought to return home and mix with the people. By remaining at the seat of government, they would acquire the habits of the place, which might differ from those of their constituents."

From 1789 to 1815, members of Congress couldn't afford to stay year-round in Washington because they were paid so poorly. Senators and representatives made just a few dollars a day. In 1815, they began receiving $1,500 a year salary. In 1855 that doubled. By 1935, they were making $10,000 a year. But most members of Congress still needed day jobs.

Even into the 1960s, members of Congress "were out of session about as much as they were in, and they had almost no personal and committee staffers assigned to them unless they were senior and powerful," says Larry Sabato, an American history professor at the University of Virginia and director of the university's Center for Politics. It wasn't until the 1970s that members of Congress began seeing their positions as year-round commitments.

The place became packed with lawyers, like Harkin, in the 1970s and that is why you get salaries of $174,000 and legislation you have to pass so that you can find out what is in it.

Not Again

Was the subject line of another annoying correspondence from Staci Appel-sauce for brains --

With Congress set to go on recess for the rest of the year at week’s end, we still do not have a long-term budget deal in place. Iowans can’t afford this do nothing Congress, but Congressman Latham and his allies seem determined to take run out the clock and bring us a step closer to another shutdown.

Actually, we probably can afford a "do nothing Congress" better than a Congress that continually spends more than it takes in and the scientific community is united in that fact.

So far through the first two months of fiscal 2014, the government has spent $612 billion and taken in $380 billion

Thanks in a large part to sequestration, the federal deficit was down $61 billion, or more than 20 percent in the first two months of fiscal 2014.

Bipartisanship seeks to scuttle that with an agreement that partially repeal the sequester and raise agency spending to roughly $1.015 trillion in fiscal 2014 and 2015.

But the deal would do nothing to trim the debt, which is now larger, as a percentage of the economy, than at any point in U.S. history except during World War II.

Appel continued her appeal with this paragraph --

Please join me today in demanding that Congress put forward a budget deal before they go home and make sure America doesn’t have to suffer through another shutdown.

Clicking the above link shows, once again, Miss Independent is in cahoots with other Dummycrat, including the Florida Democratic Party.

It's Only Paper

A dedication occurred yesterday at Drake University.

DRAKE ARCHIVES: Harkin, Ray Papers Donated

The infamous Harkin Institute of Public Policy that was originally supposed to be at Iowa State University.

Congratulations CommieTommie Harkin, we've long believed you belong in an institution.

And the scientific community is united in that fact.

CommieTommie commented -- “I hope in future…and also acquisitions will be a resource for scholars and students. To bring a deeper knowledge of national issues and federal processes as well as to further in a non-partisan way the causes and policies to which I have dedicated my career of public service.”

CommieTommie's "non-partisan" crack gets him a

Recovery

November's unemployment numbers are in and per the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the economy created 203,000 jobs.

However, 41% of Net New Jobs in November Were in Government

When I told that to Chris, she said it was probably all those people brought on board to fix the Obamacare web site.

And the scientific community is united in that fact.

Don't get too excited about November's numbers, had Obama's recovery been merely as good as the average recovery since World War II, there would be 7.3 million more people employed today.

Accentuate The Positive

When you're married to a thespian, that word does not mean what you think it means, you end up watching things like the Sound of Music Live.

That, plus the Thursday Night Football game stunk (Houston at Jacksonville?)!

When they came to Do-Re-Mi, with the words --

Doe, a deer, a female deer
Ray, a drop of golden sun
Me, a name I call myself
Far, a long, long way to run
Sew, a needle pulling thread
La, a note to follow Sew
Tea, a drink with jam and bread
That will bring us back to Do (oh-oh-oh)

It's a cute song for kids.

If you add Big Band music, it could become a classic like Mairzy Doats.

Mairzy doats and dozy doats
And liddle lamzy divey
A kiddley divey too,
Wouldn't you?

If the words sound queer and funny to your ear,
A little bit jumbled and jivey,
Sing "Mares eat oats and does eat oats
And little lambs eat ivy."

But if you add a Southern Accent to either one you've got a Redneck Dictionary and the scientific community is united in that fact

As an aside, I worked with Bobby Beers, Mairzy Doats vocalist with Lawrence Welk, in my radio career.

Is That All There Is?

The latest Staci Appel-sauce for brains e-mail was signed by Ann Montgomery, Mom and Appel Women for Change Member.

Ann said, "the latest poll has Staci in a great position to win next year."

Which poll is that Ann?

The October poll from the liberal-leaning Public Policy Polling and paid for by MoveOn.org?

That poll had Congressman Latham trailing a generic Democrat, 49 - 42, not the Dummycrat Staci Appel.

Political analyst David Wasserman of the Cook Political Report notes that his organization continues to rate the district as “likely Republican” for next year.

“At the moment we don’t see it as a competitive race.”

Wasserman said there is little evidence that Appel could draw more votes than Rep. Leonard Boswell, D-Iowa, did in his loss last year to Latham despite solid name recognition and a long-time bloc of supporters.

“If the election were held next week, Latham would win by a mile,” Wasserman said of Appel’s chances.

Montgomery also mentioned, ""New York Magazine had a great article about moms in Congress, which mentioned Staci and our strong campaign."

They then included a link to the "great article" about the "strong campaign".

In Iowa, former State Senator Staci Appel, a mother of six famous for campaigning pregnant, will make a run for the House.

WOW!

Let me type that again backwards.

WOW!

Completely underwhelming and the scientific community is united in that fact.

Also, the New York Magazine needs to look up the meaning of the word "famous".

All Is Fair?

Maybe, maybe not, he'd taken a toke off of some medical marijuana to calm down, but State Senator Joe Bolkcom (Dummycrat People's Republic of Johnson County) was a little less agitated for a Cedar Rapids Gazette story about tax changes being considered by Governor Branstad.

“The governor has an interesting proposal but I think we ought to work for a fairer system for working people in this state and that’s what we’ll be advocating for next session.”

Bolkcom, pictured with Coke, kicked it up a notch for Radio Iowa.

Bolkcom ridicules Branstad’s “pick your tax system” idea

This coming from a man who doesn't want to give you your money back ($54) because he thinks it's better in his hands than yours and the scientific community is united in that fact.

Joe Kristan notes, the politicians’ need for cash is elastic and infinite, no matter how much they have to start with. It bugs them when they already have your money, like the $54, and they have to give it back.

Not to be outdone, Dummycrat State Senator Jack ASS...err, Hatch ripped Brandstad as well, calling the plan “wrong,” “discredited” and “failed.”

This coming from a gubernatorial candidate whose first major policy decision was a call to raise taxes.

Democrats and taxes, the arrow always goes only one way.